Well I have reached the point with one friend of being able to send her a card saying I miss her (she has withdrawn from all contact with her friends for a time)....though I was in two minds and part of me didn't want to - because it exposes my vulnerability I suppose.

[Sigh]  I know I'm feeling this way because I have been hurt and rejected and the impulse is to hurt the other person in return. But I am praying that instead of this I will be able to see her as Jesus sees her - with compassion.

I am glad you are finding the counselling helpful Lesley. 

It's been my experience that those what concerns theirselves with the next life makes theirselves a powerful nuisance in this one..............

I now know I am getting stronger.

I had an email from him on Friday asking for information I know he has regarding the Church Plant I ran for three and a half years. I was exceptionally careful packing everything up to make sure all the details for everything I had done were included.

The email itself was badly spelled - exactly as if it had been written in a fit of pique (although I cannot say that it was, of course...). He could have got hold of the same information from other sources, so it could be said to be a case of reminding me what I was "missing" by leaving...

Instead of being hurt, I was merely amused. Is it a case of "three strikes and you're out"?

Meanwhile, at one of the new churches (it's a "twin" parish), I have already been approached by one of the Church Wardens to read the lessons and do intercessions from next month (despite the "ban"). We already feel accepted and we have begun to make friends... Graham has even offered to bring his Viking stuff along to their Summer Fair on July 12th.

What is really great is to find that we are being treated as an equal couple instead of him being tacked on as an afterthought, which is what happened so much at the old church.

We think we will be really happy there. Even though we know it's not perfect, we do get a real sense of community and that is just so important. And there's real potential for growth.

I enjoyed a midweek meeting at the church last week - they had a Professor from the Liverpool School of Tropical Medicine speaking about a local Typhoid outbreak in 1888 - right up my alley! It was fascinating...and nearly 50 people came to hear him.

I'm finally talking to the Diocesan Director of Ministry about my Reader Review. I've no idea how that will go. Should be in the next few weeks...

He's been especially brought in to do it - I'm not sure whether to be flattered or scared to death.

For me, at any rate, the problem has been solved.

God bless,

With love as ever,

Lesley xx (and Desmond, who moans when I turn the football off, but will have to learn to live with it!)

Just for today, dear Lord, let me realise that there is nothing that we cannot handle together - and may I pray the same prayer tomorrow.....